"Not Me!" Monday

Wishing you had an outlet that would help make your crazy life seem a tad bit normal? Wondering if anyone else's kids enjoy shouting farm animal noises at complete strangers in the grocery store? Looking for a place to vent your frustration at your toddler's propensity for eating squished grapes off of the grocery store floor (when you aren't looking, of course...)? Look no further! "Not Me!" Monday was written just for you! (Well, and for me, because really, I just need to get this stuff out!) This is where I admit my imperfections and the parts of my week that I really wish never happened! It's a little like free therapy - enjoy!

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This Sunday, I had to use the bathroom at church. I know, riveting. I had Callan with me in his car seat, which wouldn't fit in the stall, and he was super fussy. Even so, I never would have dreamed of plopping his seat down right in the doorway and using the bathroom anyway, with the stall door wide open. Not me!

It was not me who was in so much pain from a six-hour flight with a baby who just wouldn't nurse worth beans that frantically began expressing milk by hand into a mostly empty bottle of sweet tea in the front seat of the car on the way home from the airport last Wednesday. (That has to be the longest "Not Me!" run-on ever....)

You know those people who are total germophobes, who get on airplanes and insist on taking like five minutes to retrieve wet wipes and antibacterial gel from their bag, disinfecting every surface before sitting down? Yeah. They need to get a grip. Even though I was traveling with an infant, and was just a teensy bit paranoid about contracting say, piggy flu, it was not me who was just a tad bit OCD about germs and did exactly that. Nope.

Our flights to Texas were direct, but had one stop. We didn't have to change planes, but at least one segment of each flight was completely full. Completely. With the exception of maybe one seat. We fly Southwest most of the time, and on that airline you get to pick your own seat. Nursing a baby on a plane is awkward. Not so much for me anymore, since I've done it so much now, but for the people who have to sit next to you. Particularly if they're men. Even worse if they aren't married, or it they're young. Totally awkward. But, I know the rules, and I know I can't "reserve" a seat with my baby junk just to try and get some extra room. So it totally wasn't me that pulled the "whip-your-breast-and-nursing-cover-out-and-begin-nursing-the-baby-while-everyone-is-boarding-so-they-completely-avoid-taking-the-seat-next-to-you" trick. Okay, I might have done it once, but it surely wasn't me who did it four times, hoping the trick would work and score an extra seat next to us. Nope, not me!

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"Not Me!" Monday is an incredibly fun, blogging carnival started by MckMama. In a nutshell, it's where we all can be open about the ridiculous things that happen in our lives. Join in the "Not Me!" fun and leave a comment about all of the things you didn't do this week!