"Not Me!" Monday


Welcome! Are you feeling guilty for eating your weight in ice cream this week? Wondering if anyone noticed you bribing your kids with snacks so they'd be quiet during church? Perhaps you just gave in and let your kids stay up an hour and a half past their bedtime. No worries! "Not Me!" Monday was written just for you. It frees me up to admit my many imperfections and vent about the absolutely ridiculous things that are my everyday. Enjoy at my expense, and join in the fun by commenting below!


Before we get started, please keep in mind that it it's not me who had so many "Not Me!" entries this week that I had to start keeping track of them on my phone's notepad. 
Also, I learn from past mistakes. Every. Time. So it wasn't me who, first rattle out of the box, slept through four alarms again on Monday. It takes me roughly 40 minutes to get to school, which starts at 7:30am, so I left at 6:45am, not 7:00am. And I surely didn't get in the car and discover three miles down the road that I was totally out of gas. And upon such discovery, I also did not realize that I had left my driver's license and money in my jeans pocket - the jeans I had changed out of when I was painting at our house that weekend and had left on the floor of our master bedroom (remember, we're living with our in-laws until our house is fixed). Nope

But no worries, I keep a little cash in my car just in the event of something like this. I opened the little compartment where I keep it, retrieved it, skipped on over to the cheapest gas station in town, got some gas and was on my way.

I did not open the compartment to discover it empty, remembering that I had told my husband to go ahead and use it when we were at the ice cream shop last weekend. I would not use "emergency cash" in such a foolhardy manner. Not me!

I did not have to stop at our house to get said driver's license, money, and purse, and then drive to the nearest (read: most expensive) gas station to fill up, call and report to our school secretary that I was going to be late because of my own stupidity, and roll into the school parking lot at 7:45am. Not me!

Oh, and when I ran into our house to retrieve the above, I certainly did not also discover a bottle of milk I had pumped for Callan sitting in my purse. Gross.

Earlier this week when I left for work, it was raining pretty good, and I couldn't find my umbrella. But I did not steal the umbrella right out of my husband's car and take it to work with me. Nope.

I also did not put one of my husband's XXL shirts on our son at bedtime this week because I couldn't find anything else clean for him to wear.

And I certainly did not get into my car the other day and nearly keel over from the rank smell emanating from the inside. I did not run through a list of possible disgusting things my husband could have done to/left in my car before I discovered the diaper under the seat. Nope. And it definitely wasn't me who had changed the baby in the car and left it there. Not me!

Thursday mornings are a little crazy at school, since these are the days we take the students out for the therapeutic riding I've blogged about before. But still, I manage to keep everything under wraps. I do not do things like leave my Medela steam bag full of breast pump parts in the staff lounge microwave and then hop on the bus for horseback riding, only to return at 12:30pm and realize that it had been removed to the top of the microwave, where it kept the entire staff company as they rotated through and ate their lunches that day. Nope. Not me!

It so was not me who single-handedly demolished an enormous bag of around 40 Twizzlers in a mere three days this week. No way, no how.

And finally, it wasn't me who had such a "Not Me!" week that I finished blogging this last Thursday and flat out stopped adding things. Not me!


"Not Me!" Monday is an incredibly fun blogging carnival started by MckMama. In a nutshell, it's where we all can be open about the ridiculous things that happen in our everyday lives. Head on over to her blog, where you can read heaps of other great "Not Me!" stories. Or, join in the "Not Me!" fun and leave a comment about all of the things you didn't do this week!

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